Cop Harassment With Flyers

Mr friendly sheriff came along last week in an area with $200-500K homes.   He firmly told me as I shook his hand I was trespassing on private property and to move along.  Me getting wiser with age I did not get tasered and left without war.  He made some comment that I would be the first suspect if there was a breakin any time in the near future.  Mind you Im clean cut with a nice car and well clothed.  I guess communism has finally arrived and the American dream is now a has been.  Plus my wife of 23 years was with me which made us Bonnie & Clyde I guess. 

Step 2: following the friendly officers orders he told me to hang my flyers under the mailboxes on the squiggly metal design under the mailbox.  I would not be tresspassing that way.  It took one day and the US Postmaster was harrassing me for advertising within three feet of a mailbox, and threatening I had broke a federal law.  Mind you this is a very professionally printed flyer that costed some bucks.

Step three: We decided to put our advertisement in a sealable plastic zip lock bag and toss it in peoples driveways.  I got several random unknown phone calls saying I was littering and I would be charged with all sort of offenses, some of which were quite weird, including one who said I had abducted their kid after school.  Really out there!!!!!!! WOW!!!!!!!

Step four: Following the nice officers second suggestion I met up with a local advertiser in the area that ran a magazine that would help my business.  We met at the local wing eating bar and arranged the advertisement while drinking liquor and eating food to get me fat again, which is what I wanted to avoid in the first place.    The advertiser and I got along well and she suggested we go smoke some pot in her car after a few coctails.  Things came full circle then as I am older and wiser now as well as married 23 years.  This appears to be a systemic problem for which I have no answer.  I continue to improve myself and still walk the line of being arrested, which I dont understand as I get straighter and more clean cut as the years go on.  I passed on the pot by the way.  Seemed a bit cheesy for the year 2007.  I need a new high other than honesty, as it doesnt work anymore, I may go to jail for it.  NO JOKE!